Brother Peter began to regard the Devil with an air of distrust until he realized that, in fact, there was no other way to regard such a character. Undoubtedly, at that very moment the Liar was plotting one of his old tricks. Brother Peter cleared his throat and shyly said:

            —You are saying that the market saturation is a law of economics; but what does economics have to do with the saints?

—A lot, you idiot, a lot. You do not know that the essence of Marxism has its foundations in the Economics? Frankly, I do not know what my friend Marx would have done without it. I myself could never thank him enough for the number of people he has brought to my Mansion. Yes, the very Mansion which, according to your experts, is empty; are they jackasses or what! Sometimes I think that they mistake my dwelling place with their empty heads. And there is more: High Finances, the powerful Banks…If I could rejoice, I would, whenever I think about it…! With such instruments and with the great power of control that they wield, I have infiltrated myself even up to their [censured]. I am sorry, kid, it is just that the substitute of joy that these things bring to me, in spite of everything, is distracting me…! At any rate, let us get back to your saints.

            Brother Peter would not have been able to get over his astonishment, as if the very fact that he was speaking with the Devil were not already astonishing enough. He was startled when the Devil jolted and shouted at him:

            —Wipe that stupid look off your face! I do not understand your astonishment at talking with me. If you only knew the number of people who deal with me constantly as if it were the most natural thing in the world…relax; you will be happy to know that those [censured] High Above, Who have allowed me to speak with you, have set as a condition that I tell you the truth at all times. Imagine! Could they have picked a worse way to insult me?

            —Look –went on Satan— the law of the saturated market is quite simple and foolproof; when you apply it to the saints, it has spectacular results. Erasing, once and for all, the devotion that the fools and simpletons profess to them? A piece of cake. Let me give you an example that even your batrachians brain will understand. Diamonds are a rare, precious, and very scarce thing, hence their high price. But imagine that, all of a sudden, we produce such a quantity of them that we flood the market with them, making them as easily obtained as potatoes are. Do you understand what that would mean? They would automatically lose their worth, and people would cease to value them and look for them.

            —Do you get it, as you say nowadays?—continued the Devil. Let me tell you: I feel in danger of laughing to death on account of those fools who put on airs of progressive, learned men; although it is also true that, when it comes to being ridiculous, none of them surpasses the Spanish intellectuals who call themselves intellectuals of the eyebrow[1]—especially the guild member of that thing which they call movies and culture; they are ones the most prone to making me laugh myself to death. Fortunately, I cannot laugh.

—But let’s get back to the saints, for I am starting to worry myself. I am using more parentheses than a cheap journalist. –He cleared his throat again and hopped with dark enthusiasm.

—Look at me when I am talking to you, you worthless insect of a lumber room! It’s all about boosting the number of saints indefinitely and continuously. It’s awesome. Until recently, you, the simple folk, thought that the saints were extraordinary beings. They were your champions of your Faith, your role models to imitate, and intercessors to whom you could pray. All well and good, but that was until the arrival of modern times. Now, everyone has a saint nearby: your brother-in-law, your distant cousin, or your upstairs neighbor could very well be saints. Can you guess what happens? Saints no longer seem champions of great deeds, nor do they appear extraordinary because of their scarcity. Therefore, their role as especial intercessors you can turn to asking for help is becoming increasingly difficult. For who has never met his upstairs neighbor, or known of a distant cousin, or fought with his brother-in-law…? This profusion of saints was unimaginable when the canonization process used to take many years and, in some cases, several centuries.

            —Aren’t you exaggerating? –put in Brother Peter.

            This time, the Devil took no notice of the friar.

            —Well, exaggeration is just the truth with emphasis.

            —I am getting the impression that you like the canonization of new saints—Brother Peter insisted.

            At this, Satan’s eyes flared up with special intensity. He continued:

            —I certainly do, when they are abundant. You would be surprised to know that I even promote them sometimes. At some other times, there is a vested interest in certain Circles because they need to exalt someone in particular. There is much at stake, you know; although things are not always so easy.

            —On the other hand, you must understand my efforts in favor of the market economy—the Devil went on after a sort of deep breath.

            —I have devalued sainthood, Peter! You must admit with me that it used to be most expensive and difficult. Heroic deeds, terrible mortifications, taking the gospel and the Love of God seriously…; especially this last one, Peter, is something I could never bear. Taking the gospel seriously! What nonsense…! Tell me, then, what is the use of the Documents of the Conferences of Bishops; of the abundant and unknown number of references to Social Doctrine; of the sickly-sweet—I think you now use the term lite—corny writings of founders and she-founders; of the Speeches and Exhortations of many Bishops, who are gifted with the talent of never hitting the nail on the head; of the writings and doctrines of the avant-garde theologians; of the exiting and sharp articles –gosh, I almost forgot journalism—of the L’Observatore Romano…? Should not Christians express to me their gratitude for the fact that now anyone can be a saint, thanks to my campaign for the devaluation of religious life? Think, Brother Peter, even though that function of the brain is not often cultivated by you friars: it would be enough, for example, to write some book about, say, Democracy and the Rise of Spirituality in the Twentieth Century and bam! There you go…! At any rate, I do not want to frighten you. Let us drop this subject of the saints and go back to Economics.

(To be continued)