Brother Peter was startled by the blasphemy:

            -For all the saints, Satan! Don’t say crazy things!

            The Devil felt a shiver which, in a normal situation, would have been caused by joy:

            -The saints? Did you say saints, you fool...? But that has been one of my best moves ever! How I wish I could jump for joy! Yes, I know I can jump, but not for joy. You see...

            Brother Peter interrupted again, this time nervous. Finally he decided to say:

            -Ok, ok! But I think the friars may have already finished their prayers.

            -Calm down, my unhappy friar... –continued Satan- I have foreseen this and have opened up a parenthesis in time to stop it. They have not finished their prayers. I should really say that they have not even begun, for they are praying with that marvelous routine they have gotten used to; besides, they hardly believe what they are saying. This is another of the great achievements my agents and I have accomplished in the convents and monasteries of the sweet post-Council era. I don’t even want to talk to you about the nuns, my candid and detestable friar; the things I could tell you…! By the way: haven’t you seen your Abbot? It was difficult at first, but I finally got him to learn to be shortsighted when viewing the world.

            Brother Peter opened his mouth in amazement; finally, he could continue:

            -Shortsighted, you say...?

            -Of course! This individual, like any of you who give yourselves the disgusting name of Christians, but even more so an Abbot, should have opened his heart to the things that are Above... What did that cursed Saul say, who got away from me...? “Search for the things that are above,” or something like that; but enough of this, just remembering it makes me sick. Or that other wretched little African bishop –was it Augustine?—that also decided to betray me and change sides (I think that the Clergy in general are a lot like the politicians when it comes to this). What did he say? Oh yeah, “You made us Lord for you, ” etc.

            Here the Devil spit and almost hit Brother Peter.

            -Well, you see –continued Satan—, instead of doing that, your Abbot forgot his vocation and decided it was better to dedicate his time to politics. You can’t even imagine how many priests and Bishops I have set straight in this way.  Good job, guys! Some countries, like Spain for example, are full of Abbot politicians, Bishop politicians, and priest politicians (if you want, instead of politicians, you can say communists, that is the same thing for them and besides, they will feel flattered; you have to give them some compensation). That place is paradise, kid...! (Darn it, I said that cursed word again). But, can you imagine? Religion turned into politics – and in nationalistic and secessionist politics at that, which is the same as saying cheap politics. The Gospel substituted by the Communist Manifesto! Who could do more? Aren’t they being shortsighted when they look at religion and the world?

            Here was when Brother Peter started to feel an onset of anger. Some things the Abbot had done that seemed to fit what the Devil was saying came to mind. But then, could it be true that Satan tells the truth sometimes?

            -Ok, ok. But you said something about saints.

            The Devil was immersed in an expression that normally would have been the result of flattery; but filtered through his nature it seemed much more like snorting; diabolical, but snorting.

            Oh, the saints! Kid, I am more than convinced that I am an awesome Devil. What a success, what a great success! For, you see, I don’t know if you have realized that those so-called saints are pretty bothersome people; well, surely you have noticed it. You also know that, throughout the centuries, they have taken many people and have turned them away from my side definitively. Since many were taken from me, I realized that I had to eliminate them (the saints, I mean); or at least end people’s devotion to them, which is something that I haven’t been able to achieve in twenty centuries; at least until now, kid, thanks to the marvelous post-Council era. Finally! Of course! This time they call the era of the new Advent or the Ecclesial Springtime! I would have called it a time of blessing; but I hate that word, and that is why I will leave it as a time of happiness and good harvests; a name that has the advantage of having a specific meaning. Because, my little friar, in the world of priests and friars, you have an amazing aptitude for creating extravagant phrases, whose meaning is a mystery for all: Ecclesiastical Springtime..., Church of the New Advent... I ask myself how you do it. As for myself, I recognize that, though I am able to come up with a barrage of lies, I am incapable of inventing such collections of meaningless flattery. 

            Brother Peter, who had been intrigued by the saints, was becoming impatient about finding out the trick the Father of Lies had used.

            But, what about the technique you were talking about being used for the saints?

            Again snorting, this time almost of surprise.           

            -Haven’t you guessed? Economics, boy, pure economics. To achieve what I wanted I only had to apply the market saturation law. It is infallible. You should know that Economics is an important Science that you must study. Really, two afternoons would suffice; that is how my collaborators do it and it is enough for them, or at least that is what they say. But let me explain to you the market saturation law. You will be surprised at its brilliance.

(To be continued)